Forgotten Kleenex
Isn't it funny how just a little thing like a forgotten Kleenex in your pocket can mess up an entire day? Well It put me in a fairly bad mood, first I was mad at myself for putting the darn thing in my pocket, then I was really cranky that I didn't check ALL the pockets. Then I thought, maybe it was Far Guys Kleenex..now that would have been a stretch of even my imagination.
I believe that someone should invent a Kleenex that will not fall apart during the wash cycle, or maybe an even better one that would not deposit tiny white specks of fiber all over that load of clothing in the dryer. Then I remembered it has already been invented.. the hankie. Now if I always used a hankie I would be having a pretty good day. Instead I am thinking, I am sure I checked all those pockets, didn't I ??, and now I have to vacume back there really good or all those little fibery flecks are going to contaminate all the other clothing I will fold today..well maybe not Far Guys white socks.
I remember a time when I missed a crayon in one of the girls pockets, and then there was the bubble gum, and then Far Guys Ink pen..maybe they should invent a dryer that buzzes when a foreign object is inside of it. I know it would have saved me many headaches throughout the years. Some smart savvy inventor woman could do it I am sure. It would make my life so much easier...
I usually don't stick Kleenex in my pocket, but I don't carry a purse, if I need a Kleenex I usually stash one in my bra, easy to get at a moments notice..and a constant reminder that it is there and if I haven't had the occasion to use it..well it just tumbles out of my bra and onto the floor when I get ready for my bath..problem solved. It is the convenience of those darn pockets in my pants that got me into trouble this time. Guess I need a Kleenex in your Bra only rule:)
Bubble Gum= Ice or Egg Whites
Crayon= Throw away all clothing.
Ink Pen = Hair Spray
What I am Reading: Lost and Found by Carolyn Parkhurst
Posted by: farsideoffifty on 8/21/2008 at 12:01 PM | Comments (1) | Permalink
Books
Just finished reading a couple of books.
Mitch Albom's for one more day, Far Guy read it first, then I read it, on my scale of one to ten, I give it a four. Far Guy also gave it a four.
Sandra Brown's Play Dirty was an interesting read, but I gave it a five. I was not very impressed. It was just OK.
John Grogan's Marley & Me was OK, I like stories about dogs, but I found this book lacking in that the author was having a hard time keeping my attention. So it gets a three.
I discovered the art of buying used books online. I really don't care if someone else has read it first. I headed for Barnes and Noble used book area and ordered three books that I had been searching for.
I recieved a really cute email from the one small bookstore that was shipping me a book. It follows, as it is too good not to share. This gal has a marketing skill and I plan to check out her entire line of used books online.
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Just a short note to inform you that the book you ordered from The Cerebral Deli has been gently taken from the book shelf in the secret vault with sterilized contamination-free gloves and placed onto a satin pillow. A team of 50 employees inspected your book to make sure they were in the best possible condition (for a used book) before mailing. Our packing specialist from The Turtle Mountains lit a candle and a hush fell over the crowd as he put your book into the finest water proof envelope that money can buy. We all had a wonderful celebration afterwards and the whole party marched down the street to the post office where the entire town of Dunseith ND waved 'Bon Voyage!' to your package, on its way to you, in our private jet on this day. I hope you had a wonderful time shopping at The Cerebral Deli. We sure did. Your picture is on our wall as "Customer of the Year". We're all exhausted but can't wait for you to come back to the cerebraldeli.com for all your reading needs!! Oh and did I forget to tell you that from time to time, our jet is stuck on the run-way? Well because it is a book, which is media mail, it can travel "extremely" slowly. And even though I am royalty. I can't control everything. So please take that into consideration.
Thank you once again,
Patrice Gunville,
Empress of the Cerebral Deli
http://www.cerebraldeli.com/
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Wasn't that like a breath of fresh air? I thought so. If she has a book that I want, I will certainly order it from her.
Well I am off to begin reading Lost and Found by Carolyn Parkhurst:)
Posted by: farsideoffifty on 8/20/2008 at 1:14 PM | Comments (2) | Permalink
Well Far Guy joined Facebook, and yesterday so did I. I only have two friends so far, I noticed one of my nephews has 306 friends..but he is young, handsome, single and most of his friends are girls. Our granddaughter who is twelve going on twenty likes to talk to her Grandpa online.
Yesterday we tried the Chat, it works very nicely. I can see this coming in really handy as we get older and our hearing fails completely. Perhaps you would like to listen in?
CHAT
Far Guy: What do you want for supper sweetie?
Far Side: I don't care ..you choose
Far Guy: THNANKS
(This chat needs a spellcheck)
CHAT
Far Guy: You wanna let the dog in?
Far Side: We have a dog?
Far Guy: Remember Chance?
Far Side:Of course I remember Chance...could you let him in please?
CHAT
Far Guy: Could you turn the TV down?
Far Side: Why?
Far Guy: I can't hear myself typing.
Far Side: What???
END OF CHAT
I am not real sure about all these new ways of communication. I like email and the real letters I get in the mail. I have one site on the Internet that I sometimes chat in real time on...it just doesn't float my boat..but if this is just one more tool to talk to the grand kids and their Mom's then I guess I will go with the flow. Perhaps I will talk to other people too. But I will have to get more than two friends :)
Posted by: farsideoffifty on 8/19/2008 at 2:44 PM | Comments (2) | Permalink
The Day I Shot The School Nurse
Yes, I was guilty, yes I had the pistol in my hand, and yes I pulled the trigger. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time..but still guilty. When you are a teenager..bad things happen...you do stupid stuff..really..really stupid FUNNY stuff.
Funny you say..well I thought it was, and most of the school including the Principal thought so too.
It was a warm spring day back in May of 1967, one of those days you just don't want to be in school. It was a Friday, the weekend couldn't come fast enough. I was restless, so when my boy friend (not Far Guy) for the purposes of this blog we will call him ML ..anyway when he brought this "weapon" to school it livened up a rather dull day. I wrestled it from him and filled it with water..yes, it was a water pistol..or a squirt gun. I fulling intended to hit ML square in the face with the cold watery spray. Instead he ducked, low and behold guess who I got instead?? Mrs. M the School Nurse, and did I have good aim? Well if you consider right between the eyes and dripping off of her glasses good aim..then I guess I am a pretty good shot. She took off like a mad wet hen.
Now our school nurse was not a lovely old lady who was very sympathetic to sick kids needs. She was like a general, in fact I think she got her medical training in the service. She was a tiny little women who always wore her uniform, along with white hose and white shoes..most of the time she wore a colorful sweater, she always wore all her makeup and must have refreshed her orange lipstick frequently,..she never smiled...except on "shot day" when we were all lined up to get whatever immunization's the State of Minnesota deemed necessary. She smiled the entire day then, and only scowled at the kids that passed out.
There must have been about 900 kids in school that day in May. Probably about 100 of them were in that hallway when I attempted to shoot ML with that squirt gun...what are the odds that I would hit Mrs. M... pretty slim. What are the odds that I would hit her right between the scowling be speckled eyes..very slim...
I was summoned to the Principal's Office, now I have been known to sometimes stretch the truth..but I never lie. All the evidence is there ..ML and the pretty little yellow gun is on HJ's desk. HJ asks me "Did you squirt Mrs. M with the squirt gun" I replied "Yes sir, I did, I didn't aim for her, but when ML ducked she got it square in the face." Then he asked me who brought the gun to school, I replied "ML" well, our stories were the truth and they matched so we were let off with just a stern warning. Whew..
Years later, I had the opportunity to visit with HJ, he told me this " That day you shot Mrs. M with the squirt gun, was one of the toughest times for me, I could hardly keep a straight face, after you left my office I laughed until I cried.":)
Posted by: farsideoffifty on 8/18/2008 at 11:14 AM | Comments (1) | Permalink
Far Guy is a Fireman (Again)
It seems the local Volunteer Fire and Rescue Department is really short handed during the daytime, So who do they recruit.. Far Guy. There were only two guys available for daytime calls, now there are three, but then Jerry hurt is back so now they are back to two.. The Chief and Far Guy. Evenings and nighttime is covered by guys who are home at night. Daytime is another story. So I urge everyone to be really careful from the hours of 6am to 7pm.
Far Guy is supposed to be on "light duty" which means he can drive and assist. He should not be allowed in any burning buildings or lugging any hose around. He was supposed to be on light duty the last time he was on the department...it didn't work so well that time and he is older now.
I am a bit skeptical about this whole arrangement. But his need to "help out" exceeds my "I don't think this is such a good idea." The guys have warned him if he steps out of light duty they will "tell Farside" and I in turn have told the guys "You don't want me to come over there..with a complaint.. EVER." So we will see how it goes.
Don't get me wrong I support volunteerism as much as anyone, I have put in my time, as has Far Guy. If everyone would volunteer for the Fire Department..there would be no daytime shortage. There must be someone ..men or women that are well qualified that have not been discovered yet in this area.
It's not an easy thing to volunteer for. It's not easy going to a neighbor's house for a medical call. It's not easy going to a car accident with multiple victims and you know some of the parents. It's not easy going to a call where you did everything you possibly could and the person still died. It's not easy watching someones house burning down when they aren't home, it's not easy telling them that their house burned down (I did save their dog, I grabbed him and put him in an abandoned vehicle, so they had something left). It is just not easy carrying around snapshots in your head that pop in and out at their own free will.
The things that made me feel the best. Of course saving that dog. The little girl that told me," 'member when I was in that car crash and you saved me?" The elderly couple that I tended to in the middle of the night while their house burned down. A few months later..they recognized me by my voice only..neither of them had their glasses on the night of the fire..they called me their Angel and asked if they could give me a hug. I guess it must be those things that motivate most all volunteers.
When you are in your great hour of need, I hope someone is there for you. Perhaps it will be a Fireman in a blue helmet..if so... you will know enough to say Thanks Far Guy:)
Posted by: farsideoffifty on 8/17/2008 at 11:55 AM | Comments (0) | Permalink
